幸福

见到幸福这两个字，心中突然很有感触，曾几何时总觉得幸福离自己好远好远，以为这一辈子再也不能感受它了，可是，现在它已回来到我身边了。其实，幸福很简单，只要你觉得你是幸福的人，那你就是很幸福了！我现在真的感觉到自己好幸福，因为我有很多关心我的人，有我的家人，有我的朋友，也有一个不放弃我的他，你们都一直待在我身边，分享我的喜怒哀乐，陪我走过我的悲伤，鼓励我支持我，我真的好谢谢你们，没有你们，我可能再也感受不到幸福了。。。

谢谢你。。。

距离回家的日子越来越靠近了，心中的喜悦好像越来越模糊了，相反的，心中多了一个牵挂，多了一份不舍。你常对自己说，回家对自己来说是一件好事，在吉隆坡生活的自己会比现在快乐，回家后，自己将不会想起不快乐的事情，日子将会为新工作和身边的好友聚会而忙碌，渐渐的也会不记得你们这一群知己，听了这番话后，心中有阵酸溜溜的感觉，内心处也好伤心，因为这就是我给你的印象。从开始认识时，对你很陌生，就是觉得怪怪的，可能你很热心，很亲切，自己却很慢热，不太习惯你的相处方式。。。毕竟，那时候的我和你也只是伐伐之交，没什么深的交情。可是，日子一天一天的过去了，对彼此的认识与了解也加深了，你就像我的亲人般，照顾着我，看着我，同样的，我也想保护你，不愿别人误解你，我很希望你能幸福快乐，我们的相处方式很直接，很坦率，心里只想为对方好。。。直到最近，我们的友谊又跨一大步了，我虽然失去了爱情，可是我却得了一份最真最好的友情。。。在得到的同时，我也即将要失去了，因为我们要分离了，我们再也不能一起胡闹了，我们再也不能一起抱着大笑，再也不能抱着痛哭，我心里好难受，好不舍得，可是我真的要回家了。。。你表面看起来很坚强，很潇洒，总是叫我别为你操心，可是我知道你心里好难受，因为身边的好友一个个离你而去，可是你脸上总是对我们说，去吧，我会在这里祝福你。。。现在的我，只想好好的和你相处剩下在槟城的日子，让我们都有一个最美好的回忆。。。迦， 相信我，我一定会常记挂你，一定要常联络，你一定要加油，让我们一起找到自己的幸福。。。保重！

We meet...

Tonight wen to my colleague's wedding dinner, have to meet him, and when I looked at the table list, "OMG!!!" we were sitting in the same table. We met, there is no eye contact, maybe he doesnt want to look at me, i wanted to smile at him, but his sight never fall on me...Hearing something about him from my dear friend, felt so shock about those words that came out from him, anyway, he really made me felt that I should let go, and my life will be better without him...After the dinner, I felt more releasing, now just thinking on how to enjoy life, instead of thinking of him, the feeling on him is strange and scary, maybe he looked fierce tonight, =P, anyway, I dun mind anymore, and just hope my life is getting better without him...

Friday!!!!

Time flies, friday again!!! Feeling sleepy today, last night having nightmare. Actually it was exactly same as one of my good friend told me, I will be scared of being together with him instead of loving him. I dreamt of I am forced to get back together with him, in the dreamt, I was very scared and kept refusing doing that, til I woke up from the dream, my heart beat fast, and I am scared...It had been few days from the moment that he decided not to continue this relationship, nothing much change, my life is going on, my emotion is getting stable, and everything is getting back to normal...How do i feel now? Feeling peacefully, calmly, and steadily...When it's time to let go, it's the time...=)

对与错

对与错， 已不再重要了，过去的就应该让它过去吧，活在过去只会让人觉得更痛苦，就让过去成为回忆，让回忆藏在脑子里最隐蔽的角落，人应该珍惜现在拥有的，珍惜身边的一切，把握降落在自己身上的机会， 重新出发，迈向更美好的明天。。。一定要加油喔！

First day without you

Today is the first day I am staying single with zero hope to stay on with him, cried the whole night yesterday, cried the whole morning today, how did I feel now? Is it feeling better? Heart is still painful, mind is still thinking of him, emotion is still sad. Last night I did something that I never thought of that, I did something crazy, I was mad, and I lost, I lost myself just for holding this relationship, I wished I can hold this, I wished I can hug him again, I wished to hear he still loves me. I am still very sad, but my rational told me that I have to wake up, my dear friend asked me to wake up, everyone told me it was just a dream, and I have to pull myself out from the dream, it's time to wake up and goes on with my life. I am really not willing to wake up, I wan to continue with this dream, this is a sweet dream for me, no matter what happened, no matter what I need to sacrify, I just wan to stay on. But, my dear friend is right, and I asked myself, are you willing to sacrify and change yourself to suit to this relationship in future without any complaint and suffered. I know myself, the answer is no, I have been asking myself so many times, do i really love him, or just because of I am not willing to lose him, or just because of I am scared of loneliness. I can't find the answer, and it doesn't matter what is the answer now, coz he had made the decision, and he had choosen his life, it's time for me to let go him, it's time for me to think of my life, it's time for me to wake up and continue with my life...